I don't know about that. And if you lived with me every minute of the day and witnessed the ways in which I struggle, you too would doubt my strength.
I do not, for a second, believe that I have endured what I have because God saw me, and thought, "she's pretty tough, so I will allow this to happen."
I believe that He allowed it to happen for reasons and ways that I do not understand. But I do not believe he allows certain things to happen because He thinks one is stronger than another.
I believe things happen because we live in a fallen world. I believe things happen for a reason.
Here's the thing: I believe everybody is strong.
Circumstances do not arise based on our ability of our own strength. Our strength arises when circumstances leave little room for anything else.
I believe, when it comes down to it, you don't know how strong you are or how strong you can be, until a circumstance draws that strength out of you.
I believe most people are amazingly strong.
I think a lot of people do not realize the strength they have that lies within.
There have been many days, many moments, sometimes before my feet ever hit the floor in the morning, and I utter, "I can't! I just can't!"
"You chose the wrong girl, Lord. I can't do this! I don't want to! I am not able to bear the responsibility of this!"
It doesn't matter. No matter what I say. No matter what I think, it doesn't change what happened.
And most times, that is such a strong, bitter reality to realize.
And so most days, in the early morning light, in the darkness of the night, the only thing I can utter to my God, the only prayer I can whisper, is this, "Lord, I need You to sustain me. I need You to meet me right here where I am, for I cannot take a single step towards You."
"So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous hand."
". . . I am he, I am he who will sustain you. I have made you and I will carry you; I will sustain you and I will rescue you."